


Is This Sell-able?

by OMFGhehehe, SoaringBallad



Series: Haikyuu!! Fantasy AU [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Aoba Jousai are pirates, Bokuto and Akaashi are running a shop, False Advertising, Humor, Like Lots, M/M, Pirates, akiteru's a bad cook, centipeed, dinosaurs breath fire, he also dies but is brought back so..., ripping people off too, tsukishima wants to be a dino, wasted money
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-05
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-07-21 15:32:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7393177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OMFGhehehe/pseuds/OMFGhehehe, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoaringBallad/pseuds/SoaringBallad
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bokuto and Akaashi are working in their shop to earn money so they can flee the country. They also want to go to the festival. They make enough money with all the crazy customers who come.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Is This Sell-able?

**Author's Note:**

> Me and SoaringBallad are doing another Fantasy AU, but it's for Haikyuu!! this time. I hope you enjoy!

“Is this sellable?” Bokuto questioned his friend holding up what looked to be an orb of pure, crystal clear blue water. It was amazing how the water continued to hold its shape despite not being in any sort of container.

“Anything is sellable, Bokuto,” Akaashi said. People would buy just about anything. It didn’t matter if said item was dangerous or not, as long as someone thought it would do something cool, they were willing to buy it. “Besides, we can always lie about what it is if it comes down to it.” The orb was not dangerous per say, but if used incorrectly, bad things could happen.

“Well if you say so,” Bokuto said looking a little unsure. He didn’t want anyone to die today. They needed money for traveling expenses, and they would be selling various things that Akaashi has made over the years that he didn’t really need. Sadly Bokuto didn’t know what half the stuff even was, so how was he supposed to convince people to buy it?!

“You could probably take this too,” Akaashi said, handing him a mysterious liquid that was a deep maroon colour. The fluid sat a couple millimeters above the bottom of the beaker it was kept in, but Bokuto did not know how.

“What is this?” Bokuto asked as he brought the flash up to his face, trying to observe it in better detail. “Is it something you ingest?” He received a nod and he took a big whiff of the substance. It didn’t seem to have a particularly bad odor, but he didn’t know anyone who would want to willingly drink it.

“Oh, that,” Akaashi seemed a little uncomfortable to discuss the particulars. “Just tell them that it, uh, heals.” Bokuto seemed hesitant at his friends answer, wanting to know what it really was, but decided it didn’t matter that much in the long run. As long as they could sell it and make money, Bokuto would be happy.

              The two worked in quiet for a while as they stuck pricing stickers on the wares. Occasionally Bokuto would ask about something, but Akaashi usually just shut him down. It made Bokuto wonder if anyone would be able to tell what they were selling. He figured it was probably just him who was in the dark since he didn’t know much about alchemy.

              “Are you open for business?” a passerby asked as they walked by. Bokuto looked at Akaashi, who shrugged in response.

              “Yeah, come on in,” Bokuto said, ushering them into the tent. It was dark, probably to conceal the finer details of the potions and goods. “We have a lot of great things for sale. Are you looking for anything in particular?”

              The young woman seemed to ponder for a second before saying something neither Bokuto nor Akaashi expected, “I need some palle rana, lucertola, polvere di fata, and the air from a deflated basketball.” Bokuto had no idea what language she was speaking for the first three, but at least he got the last one. What a strange request.

              “I think we have all of that,” Akaashi said. He began flitting around the small shop looking for everything she asked for. She met him in the back of the tent where he had bagged her stuff together. She pulled out the proper coinage and paid for her goods.

              “You had all of that?” Bokuto asked surprised. Who keeps the air from a deflated basketball lying around? Who even needs that? He was also shocked that his friend knew what everything she asked for was. He probably couldn’t even repeat her request.

              “No, I didn’t,” Akaashi admitted. “I gave her a salamander instead of a lizard. And the pixie dust? I hope she doesn’t mind fairy dust.” Bokuto just let his mouth fall open with the confessions from Akaashi. He was worried what would happen if the women noticed. Akaashi seemed to notice his worry. “Don’t worry, the differences are so miniscule I doubt it even makes a difference.”

              “B-b-but, you told her that--!” Bokuto was cut off by a look from Akaashi.

              “I know what she thinks I gave her, but, I didn’t want to lose customers this early. If you want to make enough money to close shop early to enjoy the festival, then we will have to serve every customer, no matter if we have the product or not.” Bokuto quickly shut up, as he really wanted to enjoy the festival they had set up their shop at. It was a festival held every other year and Bokuto had only went once as a child. He had fond memories of the time though, and hoped to make more with his best friend. It would probably be his last chance to go, as once they left, they were not planning on coming back.

              It didn’t take long for another customer to appear. He greeted them with a warm smile. “Hey, I’m Akiteru,” The man said like he needed to introduce himself. “I was looking for something that will make my next dish extra spectacular.” Bokuto and Akaashi exchanged a look. Nothing in their shop was meant for culinary purposes, but they needed the money.

              “I suggest you take a look at this,” Bokuto said as he lead Akiteru over to the watery orb he was looking at earlier. “It is sure to make any dish an explosion of flavor!” Bokuto wasn’t sure what would happen if this was consumed, but he did notice Akaashi was looking pale. Bokuto cocked an eyebrow and Akaashi mouthed something to him that he didn’t understand.

              “This looks interesting!” Akiteru exclaimed gleefully. “I’ll take it!” He allowed himself to be led to the back of the tent where he paid. Just as he was leaving, a group of people came in. They were talking loudly and it was already obvious to Akaashi they would be obnoxious.

              “I know what I’m doing,” the tall brunet said loudly. The man by his side gave him an incredulous look. “Really, I do,” he reaffirmed. The other man snorted but seemed to give in. “I need a potion that will let me see under the water when I’m on my ship.” Bokuto looked at Akaashi wondering if such a thing even existed, but Akaashi was already moving away.

              He picked up a few of the items already in stock and took them to the counter. “I don’t actually have the potion, but all you have to do is mix these together,” he explained. Bokuto couldn’t determine whether Akaashi was selling them the real deal or not, but he decided to give his friend the benefit of the doubt.

              They expected the rowdy group to leave, but they continued to wander around the store, picking up something every once and a while to remark on it. Kentarou noticed that there was dried scat on display. A sly smirk made its way to his lips. He picked up a piece and threw it at Yahaba who screeched when he realized what it was.

              “This says it’s a genuine rabbit’s foot!” One of the pirates, Kunimi said.

              “That looks like it could be a rabbit’s foot,” Kindaichi, his best friend, said. Kindaichi had seen a rabbit once when he was a small boy. It was one of the reasons that he prefered life at sea. There were no small mammals to sneak up on you.

              “They are supposed to be lucky,” Kunimi said. He picked it up, intent on buying it when poop was thrown his way. He dropped the foot and watched it scatter into a thousand tiny pieces.

              “Guys!” Iwaizumi barked. He was tired of the rest of the crew acting like children. Honestly though, he was just afraid they were going to have to pay for all of the merchandise they broke. Could scat be considered broken?

              “What?” Kentarou snapped back. He then realized it was Iwaizumi who had spoken and looked a little sheepish. The rest of the crew settled down and waited for Iwaizumi to finish speaking.

              “We’ll wait outside for Oikawa, just put everything back where you found it and come on,” Iwaizumi ordered, taking charge like a mom. Most of the group complied, but Yahaba wanted revenge on Kentarou. He looked for something he could use to gross the younger male out. Then his eyes landed on the perfect thing. There was a jar of centipeed creatures. They were like centipedes, but had the distinct smell of urine.

              “Hey wait up, Kentarou,” Yahaba called. The other male turned around to see what Yahaba wanted and didn’t expect the jar’s contents to be emptied on him. “How do you like that.”

              “Ew, what’s that smell?” one of the crew members shouted, jumping away from Kentarou.

              “Centipeeds,” Kentarou said, smirking. “I used to eat these things for breakfast.” He punctuated his sentence by biting into one of the foul creatures. Luckily for him, centipeeds, unlike their cousin centipedes, were not poisonous.

              Yahaba couldn’t believe his plan had failed. Now he was the one grossed out. “You’ll be paying for that,” Akaashi commented in the background. It seemed his wallet would be suffering with him as well. Those centipeeds weren’t cheap. He was kind of hoping he could just scrap them back in the jar and no one would notice he took them out.

              “Come on, pay for your centipeeds and then we’ll be taking our leave,” Oikawa said cheerfully, seemingly unaware of Yahaba’s turmoil. After Yahaba forked over a handsome amount, even though it wasn’t quite the full price, Akaashi was going to let it slide, he did have a heart after all, the group of pirates left.

              They had a bit of quiet after the pirates. A couple of customers came and went, but they didn’t stay for very long and weren’t very memorable. It wasn’t until a pair came in that things started to get lively again.

              “Excuse me!” A timid voice called. “Are you still open?” Bokuto went to greet the customers and see if he could help them find anything. Unsurprisingly, they were looking for something specific. “My friend,” the boy said gesturing to the his tall blond friend, “wants something to enchant his rapier with fire.”

              “We have something that will work,” Bokuto lied. He wasn’t actually sure they would have something, but he figured Akaashi would make something up. He led them to Akaashi who pointed them to the correct item. The duo paid and started to make their way out when the tall blond downed the entire flask. Akaashi looked on in shock. This boy was obviously really stupid. He didn’t know how he was going to get around being accused of murder, and that would really put a damper on his and Bokuto’s plans. Bokuto on the other hand wondered why the boy drank the flask instead of putting it on his sword or something, but he just figured that that was how some things worked.

              “Bokuto,” Akaashi said, voice super serious. “That boy is going to die. No, he is dead,” Akaashi corrected seeing the boy crumple to the ground. “We need to get out of here. Like now.” Deciding not to argue with Akaashi, Bokuto helped pack up their belongings as quick as he could. He had been itching to get out and enjoy the festival anyway.

              “Tsukki, you were supposed to wait until we left. I knew you were excited to have fire breath just like a dinosaur, but,” Suddenly Yamaguchi cut himself off. “Wait, you aren’t breathing. Tsukki? Tsukki please tell me you are okay. It’s a joke right?” He began to get hysterical. “Tsukki you can’t die. You’re too young. Please get up.” Then he remembered his training. He knew how to cast a reviving spell.

              It wasn’t too difficult, although it did make him extremely tired. Within seconds, Tsukishima was back in the world of the living. “TSUKKI!” Yamaguchi exclaimed, happy his friend was alive once more. Said friend just looked annoyed at his screaming.

              “Shut up, Yamaguchi,” Tsukishima said. Akaashi and Bokuto were moved by the heartwarming scene, but still decided it was best to leave. They probably would have a lot of angry customers coming back for refunds soon.

              Bokuto let out a sigh of relief as he stepped out of the store. He was glad to be out of there. After being cooped up for so long, all of his muscles felt tense. Plus the tent was hot. “We’re going to the festival now, right?” he asked. He received a nod and couldn’t help the, “Hey! Hey! Hey!” that erupted from his throat.

              “We can only stay for a couple of hours,” Akaashi reminded. He knew if Bokuto had his way they would probably camp at the festival so they could make the most of it. The walk to the festival was short and they were soon inside.

              “What should we do first?” Bokuto asked his companion with sparkling eyes, and also sparklers in his hands. Akaashi had no idea where he got those, but decided not to ask.

              “Whatever you want to do is fine,” Akaashi answered. He wasn’t really excited about the festival, but it was Bokuto’s favorite time of the year.

              “Then let’s go play some games!” Bokuto had way too much energy after working a long shift in the tent. He dragged Akaashi from game to game winning silly little prizes until… “We can win live fish!”

              “They’re just goldfish.” Akaashi didn’t understand the appeal. When he was younger he won hundreds. When he told that to Bokuto, the older male made him play.

              “You better win me lots!” Bokuto said. With that, Akaashi got to work. All he had to do was get the ball into the abnormally small cup. He threw his first ball only to have it ricochet off three cups, almost going into the fourth, but then rolling onto the floor. That was fine, he still had four balls left.

              Those four balls weren’t enough. Maybe the game had changed from when he was younger, or maybe he just lost all of his skill. Bokuto didn’t seem to mind. He just paid for five more balls. Five more turned into ten, ten into fifteen, and fifteen into one hundred and twenty. It was on the one hundred and eighteenth that he won a goldfish, and on the next two he also won.

              “They’re so cute!” Bokuto exclaimed as he gazed through the thin plastic bag at three abnormally small fish. It seemed they missed their abnormally small cup home. They were swimming around erratically which made the bag wriggle in his hand.

              Akaashi took that moment to look at his watch and almost shit his pants at the time. It was way past the time he thought they should leave. He was about to inform Bokuto, but it seemed his partner had disappeared. Akaashi could only sigh.

              He waited a while before Bokuto reappeared with cotton candy in his hand. “I love cotton candy, it’s so fluffy!” To illustrate his point, he fluffed the candy up a little. “I’m going to keep it forever so I never forget this night!”

              “Bokuto, no,” Akaashi said. He didn’t want his friend to let the candy get moldy or attract flies.

              “Bokuto, yes!” Bokuto said with a laugh. He reached out the hand holding the goldfish to hold Akaashi’s and the two of them made their way out of the festival grounds to their new home.


End file.
